When did this happen? One day I just woke up and realized that I wasn’t getting any attention. Let me explain. I am in my 60s and still energetic, youthful and pursuing my dreams. I am approachable, friendly, gainfully employed and I think I am fairly attractive. I know that I am an interesting person. I’m stylish. So, I am wondering why I am never approached anymore. I have to admit that this is a difficult phase saying goodbye to the time that I was constantly approached, propositioned, winked at or asked out. All gestures were not necessarily desirable, but honestly, it fed the ego. I just did not realize how much this mattered until now.
This is a story that I hear too often from women within a 10-year older or younger radius of my age. The dating scene and relationships seem to be hard to come by, but no one can answer the $64,000 question, “Why?” I’m talking about women who have moral values, integrity, they’re attractive, self-sufficient…..not damsels in distress looking for prince charming to show up. Women who are desirable and would make great companions. I know that by this time in life, most of us have had different experiences with relationships. Many of us are divorced for one reason or another. Some are widows. Some have never been married, but may have experienced abuse or betrayal. You name it, we’ve been through it! But, we still want to be desired and to have companionship.
I am fairly active in my community. I attend different events. I go to church. I do work from home, so I am not out as much as I used to be in the big city. No matter what I am doing, I don’t seem to get noticed. I even went as far as to do a survey with men I know and trust. I asked them was there something about me or something I was doing that would make men not want to approach me. Some of the answers I got were, “You’re intimidating,” “You look like you’re married,” and “You seem like you’re high maintenance.” Wow! It is amazing how many assumptions people make about people. I can’t believe that a man would look at me without having a conversation or as much as a hello, and determine these things about me.
As I said earlier, giving up the phase of being approached, desired or asked out is not easy. I have come to a conclusion, though. I have decided that any man who would make all of these assumptions about me is not worthy of my company. I know that I am a good person. Beyond that, I am gifted, talented, fun-loving, intelligent, caring and kind. I would love to be in a committed relationship, but I refuse to stop living because it has not happened for me. I encourage any woman reading this and can relate to enjoy life to the fullest. A relationship does not define you. Don’t close yourself off, but do not allow your relationship status to be a hindrance. Loving YOU is the best thing you can do.
